Hello Everyone. Happy Holidays! It’s 4 days left to the New Year and a lot of us have started with the ‘New Year New Me’ motto again. Lol. Some of us have written ours, some are calling it goals. Well, have you thought about these negative habits we have portrayed during the year that have made people uncomfortable around us or the ones that have made us lose some friends? I have gathered a few and if you are familiar with at least one of the ten, you really need to work on that.
1. TAKING THINGS TOO PERSONAL
Yes, we all know life is hard. But do you know that taking everything that happens to you or that is said to you to heart will make it even harder? This habit tends to come in the form of basing your worth on how a situation turns out. Your friend who asks you for advice decides to ask another friend of yours and you suddenly conclude that you are not a trusted friend? This attitude is destructive to that relationship.
Avoid jumping into conclusion
Confront your friend politely and ask why.
2. ALWAYS ACTING LIKE THE VICTIM
The world isn’t out to destroy you but by thinking so can draw people away from you. You keep hiding under excuses, you keep telling people your endless problems or your day has never been good. If these sound familiar, then something is wrong. There are many aspects of our lives that we can’t control but having a negative and helpless attitude isn’t what is going to push you forward.
Believe in yourself
It’s okay to feel sad but make plans to rectify that feeling.
No one is a Saint. We all are guilty of this. However, when it becomes incessant especially talking about people in a negative way, it becomes less pleasant. The reason to gossip doesn’t always have to revolve around putting others down and sharing judgemental opinions in an attempt to make ourselves look and feel better.
Attempt to change the subject
Try focusing on your goals and keep yourself busy
Have a me time
4. NOT ACCEPTING CRITICISM
Once Bola starts advising that you should try to change that bad attitude, you shut her up defensively and start listing her flaws. This is soo not cool. We are not perfect and that is what makes us human. Acknowledging and accepting our flaws takes time but we still need to take some chill pills. Do you know that majority of successful people are those who accept critiques and by refusing to accept one, you not only hinder the possibility of you improving as a person but could also unintentionally make people around you uncomfortable.
Realize that the person is trying to help and he or she truly cares
Be mindful of your body language while receiving advice.
A little jealousy is good for motivation but a lot of it is bad for everything else. While the natural feeling of jealousy can push people to become better, the constant feeling of it is the reason why people become pushed away. It makes you want to be like that person.
Be honest with yourself.
Improve yourself and be better than that person.
6. NEEDING CONSTANT VALIDATION
The thing about this is that you let other people define how you are. You can’t do anything without asking for others’ opinions. If you keep up with this, you wont be able to be you anymore. Although the way we are perceived by others matter, we shouldn’t let it be the definition of us. Mind you, don’t let social media define you either (the number of likes or the number of followers), it’s just a number. It really doesn’t prove how loved you are. Make an effort to take time to grow as a person and differentiate and focus on the tasks that are important to you instead of the ones that are approval seeking.
7. PEOPLE PLEASING
We all want people to like us plus we try our best to be nice around them and this gives us that tendency to always want to please them. At work and among friends, you always want to keep the peace so you go along with whatever that lousy or bigmouthed girl says because you don’t want her to tonguelash you. This needs to stop. We all have to be honest. If you know you can’t do it, say it and then, they will respect your opinion.
8. NEVER LETTING GO OF THE PAST
If you are always looking back, you will never move forward. The past doesn’t dictate the future. Whatever happened then was a lesson. Work on it and let it slide.
9. COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS
Oh my! Social media is great. Yes we know especially in this instagram age where we all have fake people. They want to show all they’ve got and you are there comparing yourself with them. Don’t let them fool you . It’s all business and branding. Just be you. Go girl!
10. NEVER APPRECIATING WHAT YOU HAVE.
Appreciate the little things and you will notice that you will always be happy.
Read also: Steps to being a happier person.
Do you find any of these familiar? Do you plan to change them this coming year? Do let me know your thoughts in the comment section.
Thanks for stopping by!